Thursday, January 31, 2008

Talk to the hand

This morning as I was crossing Burrard on my way to the office, the woman in front of me held up her hand to all cars. She didn't just casually lift her hand to say "Hey! Thanks for stopping" or even "Hey! Nice wheels!". No, she FLUNG her hand towards the cars waiting patiently for us as we crossed the road as if to say "LOOK AT MY HAND! IT IS POWERFUL AND MIGHTY, YOU ASSHOLE DRIVER!!!"

I witness this kind of behaviour frequently when navigating my car through Vancouver traffic...and I am going to be honest with simply does NOT illicit the response that I think this lady is thinking it does.

It takes EVERY ounce of my restraint to NOT step on the gas and run over pedestrians that "give me the hand". Do they really think the only reason I'm not running them over is because of their hand? That I say to myself "OH! Its a hand! I guess I won't run the red light and mow down this pedestrian because of THE HAND!"?

Silly walkers. What I, and I am guessing every other driver being given "the hand" is thinking is "I really want to run you over. Desperately. Do you REALLY think I'm that dumb? Do you REALLY think you are that much better than me because you are a pedestrian? You are an idiot. I want to make you road pizza. Grrrrrrrrr."

Perhaps I have a bit of pent up rage I need to deal with...

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