Friday, June 22, 2007

Clothing optional

Yesterday when I was heading to my car, I noticed that someone had placed their socks lovingly in front of my passenger door.

I always get concerned about abandoned clothing, particularly abandoned shoes. It offends my sensibilities. Who would DO that to poor innocent clothing-especially shoes? I know many shoes that I see flung cruelly over electrical wires are from evil bullies who rip them from the feet of poor little geeks. Bullies like Tricia Johnson who threatened to beat me up in grade 8. Tricia was a foot shorter than me. Needless to say, it didn't go well for her. But I digress.

I just don't get the abandoned clothing thing. I am suspicious that these socks were a token of affection from the toothless man who was lurking near my car telling me I was looking "FIIIINE". Or at least I think thats what he said. He had no teeth. And I think he had just drunk his weight in JD judging by the empty bottles in the area. His buddy also said something to me, but I didn't catch it as he was too busy talking on his cell phone.

Yah, I was confused by that one too.

But if they WEREN'T a token of affection, how did they get there. Do people just randomly stroll down the street then say to themselves, "You know, I would be much happier if I wasn't wearing socks (or pants, or a shirt). I think I will take them off right now and put them in front of this lovely little yellow Protege 5 with fuzzy dice in the window. Ah yes, I feel so much better."

I can't think of a situation in which I have EVER felt the need to abandon my clothing. I will admit, I took my nylons off at work the other day and threw them out because they had a run in them, but THAT is a different story. Clothing abandonment is just downright irresponsible. And a bit weird.

So socks remain a mystery.

A mystery never to be solved I am assuming, until the next piece of errant clothing makes its way to my vehicle.

Ah New I love you...


matty said...

socks can be most worrying -- especially when discarded at someone's home or car. but, all the more disturbing is how cute they can be when turned or worked into monkeys.

even more mysterious is the fact that I love sock monkeys but own none. i do own socks. i would never just leave them about!

if you should find a jock strap next time you might want to move.

just sayin!

sasskitty said...

I LOVE sock monkeys! And too don't own one...